Avatar; The Bigger Picture

Standing in front of the red-box DVD machine at Publix on the eve of my birthday celebration is definitley not what I had originally anticipated. In fact, I do not know many people that could rationalize that plan as anything remotley entertaining.

Originally, for my 23rd birthday, my boyfriend and I had planned a grand evening. First, we decided, we would dine at a delicious Italian eatery--the Macaroni Grill. Next, we would follow our grand dinner with fun games of bowling, and arcade fun. Lastly, we had planned,...we would walk over to Beef O Bradys and indulge in their rich chocolate cheesecake, and yummy mudslide drinks. It was undoubtedly a wonderful plan. However, seemingly similar to every other festive occasion in my lifetime.....I got sick at the very openings of the fun. Therefore, my boyfriend and I resigned to rent a DVD at Publix, and stay in for the evening.

My luck did not improve in selecting our DVD choice. Alone at Publix,and in front of the red-box, I felt completley cornered as an 8 year old boy sighed impatiently behind me. Clearly, he was anxious to get his hands on the new copy of "Natures Fury." I know this because he kept whispering such to his mother; adding at the end of his whines: "this lady is taking FOREVER!!!"Resigned to the red-box on the night of my birthday fun, I almost had the spite to retort: "the movie went straight to box-office for a reason kid! Not to mention...it stars Brennan Frasier. Keep your pants on!" But alas.

Feeling rushed to make a decision, I selected the first appealing movie I could find. To realistically portray my time at the red box for my readers....I did not even scroll past the "A's" on the alphabetical list...and came home with "Avatar." Yes, dear readers, its true. The boy in the line behind me might actually be the worlds' first person to have LESS patience than me.

I know that in this time of the post,I should probably discuss how great the animation was in the film, or how much I enjoyed the story, or how vastly it exceeded my preconceptions. And in truth,all three of the aforementioned statements are true. But that is not what I want to focus on today. Today I'd like to focus on a specific quote in the film that is not only true to my life; but should be a rule in everyone elses.

Specifically, within the movie, their comes a certain instance in which the stories' protagonist must risk his life (literally) to acheive his dreams. Explaning himself, the protagonist narrates this predicament for viewers. He says: "Have you ever noticed how, sometimes in life, your life boils down to one insane move?"

Though the film was inarguably well done, it was the abovementioned quote that continually stuck with me.

Personally, I recognize my own "insane move" as my relocation from the quaint city of Tallahassee, to the seeming metropolis of Orlando. Tallahassee, of course, was my own birth-place. Furthermore, it was the city in which most of my friends resided, as well as my close-knit family. Tallahassee was, and is, a city that I love very deeply. It was a place that I shared many tears, and also several happinesses. In Tallahassee, I had graduated from schools, made many friends, had several adventures, and ultimatley lived for the better part of my young life. But after my last year at Community College, I began to recognize the need for change in scenery.

Upon graduating from TCC, my boyfriend moved to Orlando for his own carreer path. I visited him from time to time; eventually touring the collegiate campus there. At first glance, I somehow knew that UCF was the proper place for me. As a result, I submitted all my application papers there...and waited for the Universities' feedback.

BUT ANYWAYS....BACK TO THAT INSANE MOVE

I will never forget seriously questioning my own sanity on the night of December 19th, 2009. At 12 P.M., that night,I had loaded up my entire town-home (residence for THREE years), into my Isuzu Rodeo. Thats right....all the contents of my life for the last three years were packed into my SUV....at midnight.... But perhaps the real kicker of this story, is that the aforementioned Rodeo had been in the mechanics shop until 3pm that very afternoon, and that post midnight....I was heading to Orlando, FL.

So there I was....midnight....pitch black...Rodeo loaded down with my entire Tallahassee life.....heading to Orlando. It was only when I reached the mid-way point of the drive, that I seriously began questioning myself. "What if the relationship didn't work..and my boyfriend was the only person I knew there?!" "What if I missed my friends/family too badly?!" "Would I make any friends at school?" "Would I even be accepted at UCF?!" For the first time in my life.....I was completley without a plan. It was the scariest moment in my entire life. Looking back now, I sometimes wonder if I didnt have a guardian angel driving that car---ensuring my safety on the road as my mind wildly ambled. Furthermore, I wonder sometimes if that same angel didnt follow me to Orlando---where my friends from Tallahassee soon arrived for comforting,consoling visits.

Upon arriving in Orlando, it just seemed as everything fell directly into place. After two days past Christmas, and one day prior to friendly new-years company arriving....I got the best news of my life. I can still remember the pride, and chills I felt in our old apartment complex' computer lab. I opened my inbox emails and read the five, most beautiful words I had ever seen: "Congratulations....You have been accepted...." From that point on, despite consistent home-sickness, I knew that I had made the right choice in moving.

The friends in Tallahassee that have stayed in my life took the initiative...and came frequently for fun visits. The experience at UCF has been amazing, educational, and uncomparable. My boyfriend and my relationship has strengthened as a result of the move..not suffered. But perhaps the greatest result of all these things....is the confidence the move wrought me. I realize, with pride, that in moving....I found myself. No longer am I terrified of the future, or the idea of change. Moving once again, or staying in Orlando mean similar happinesses to me. I know now that I can handle whatever life throws at me.....and I am ready for the challenge. This is the gift of my "insane move."

Personally, I feel as though it is important for everyone to have their own "insane move." When discussing this quote with one of my closest friends, she told me of her, personal "move" story. In listening, I realized that her story was just as life-defining as my own. Perhaps one of the most annoying things on planet earth is the person with one million "pipe-dreams," which never occur. However, surmisably ,even more annoying that that is the person with one million real dreams which they never pursue. My advice to you, readers, is to go after those dreams....pursue those fears...take that risk....no matter how "insane" it may seem. It just might be the one risk you take that defines your life......

They Say It's Your Birthday...

Greetings all! The date is June 10, 2010.

On this day, in 1987, yours truly was grabbing the brass ring of life. My poor, POOR mother had to have a cessarean operation because I, decidedly, was coming into the world in the opposite..er..direction. My mother still jokes with me about this saying plainly: "ever since your birth I knew you were gonna be a real butt-head" (insert laughter here).

But I digress......

Today has got to be one of the most boring, silly birthday-days I have ever had--but surprisingly not the worst. To recap this years age-adder: I am turning 23, I am at UCF in summer classes, and its a Thursday. To any other standard; this birthday would be exceptionally pathetic. Except that last year I had a birthday that was 50x worse, inspired tears, and required me to stay in the computer lab for 8 hours straight. At least this year I know I'm going out to a fun dinner with my boo tomorrow....

THE WORST BIRTHDAY EVER

The worst birthday ever, for me, was June 10, 2009. It all began when I decided to enroll in summer classes. Instincitvley, I knew that in order to keep on track with my classmates, I needed a vital credit in summer semester--the god-awful "major authors course." Therefore, I registered for the one course available, which fulfilled this credit, and called it a day. I would not allow myself to even minutley CONSULT the "ratemyprofessors" page; for the ultimate fear of what I might find. This could go down as one of the greatest mistakes of my life.

Summer A began as any other semester. For a week, or maybe two, I was able to fool myself into believing that I could get through it. And then...I read my major authors syllabus. Throughout the semester (pertaining to 6 weeks), 8 books were to be read by Hemingway and Fitzgerald. To add, three position papers were due. Furhtermore, we had to write a critical, scholarly essay due every week, along with a post about an author, and a discussion post of what we learned in class. To end, we presented a project, AND turned in a final portfolio at the finale of class. OH! And did I mention we had a written final too?!

To make matters worse, I had a teacher who MUST have been a literal slave-driver in another life. I do not know what happened to this, particular professor within the course of her own life, but whatever it was must have been terrible. She was seriously probably one of the most spiteful, hateful women I've ever come across--and I'll never forget how wrongfully she treated her students. To her defense I'm not sure she even knew she came across this way...but she did. Teachers like her inspire me to possibly educate someday--only to "cancel out" haneous professsors, such as herself.

Anyways...back to June 10, 2009

I went to the library on my birthday LAST YEAR...after class (at around 4)to work on my aforementioned project, and worked on it for five hours straight. Then, I took a small break to let my body thaw from the ice freeze of the library, then reemerged for more schoolwork. All the meanwhile, my poor boyfriend was calling me left and right to ensure my safety/sanity. At 9 PM, I finally decided to put an end to my misery. I was just about to leave the library for GOOD, when I happened to check my email. My professor had written me jus about the nastiest email I'd ever received. Basically, she demanded to know just what literature classes I'd taken before...and how I'd gotten this far at UCF? All this from the reception of one small assignment she disagreed with. Like I said....cold-hearted. I stared blankly back at this email for what felt like eons before I planted my next move.

Firstly, I redid the assignment to let my anger subside. But it didnt work. Finally, I just went ahead and emailed her back...letting her know abut my 3.0 GPA from other, tough literary professors, and how I'd been in the library for 8 hours for her class alone. Oh, and yes, I totally told her it was my birthday---I didnt mind stooping to the sympathy ploy at ALL.

I left that library, on my birthday, crying and horribly upset. And even though I still consider it to be my worst birthday ever....it completley reaffirmed the people I've chosen to spend my years' growth with. My best friends were there to console me, to assure me of a "job well done" for telling teh teacher off, and to ensure that I was makign the best birthday out of a hellacious situaion that I could. Furthermore, when I got home, my boyfriend had bought me flowers and cleaned the house, and even cooked me dinner. To add, he made me a nice hot bubble bath, and brought me a glass of wine.

I came to a conclusion that day that no matter how silly my birthdays seem, no matter how ridiculous I feel about celebrating an unglamorous year, my friends and family make each year of my life seem so special. And so it is that I welcome another year, at age 23. Knowing that I am opening my life to yet another year of fabulous friendships, love, and ultimate happiness. You guys are seriously the best; and you make any day feel like my day!